Indivibes: A Year in 32: Saying Yes To MyselF
This month, I turned 32 this year.
The other day, I realized something that made me stop for a second. I was 24 when I released my very first song, "Have Your Fun."
Back then, I had no idea where music would take me. I didn't know who would listen, if anyone would connect with it, or what kind of artist I'd become. I just knew I had something to say, and I finally found the courage to put it out into the world.
Looking back now, it feels like that version of me was introducing herself for the first time. It's wild to think that almost eight years have passed since then. When I was 24, I thought I had a pretty good idea of what life at 32 would look like. I imagined more music, more opportunities, and honestly, just feeling like I had everything figured out.
Life doesn't really work like that.
Some years I wrote a lot. Some years I barely wrote at all. There were moments where I felt confident in what I was creating, and there were moments where I questioned if I was good enough to keep going. There were opportunities I never saw coming. There were disappointments I didn't expect. There were seasons where music felt like home, and seasons where I had to find my way back to it.
The funny thing is, I don't regret any of it.
Every season gave me something.
Some taught me patience.
Some taught me confidence.
Some taught me that not every chapter has to be loud for it to matter.
When I listen to songs I've written over the years, I can hear myself growing without even realizing it. Every project feels like a snapshot of who I was at that moment. Some songs sound hopeful. Some sound confused. Some sound heartbroken. Some sound like I was finally starting to trust myself. I think that's one of the coolest things about making music. You end up documenting your life without meaning to.
Turning 32 made me think less about where I'm behind and more about how much I've actually lived.For the first time in a while, I wasn't asking myself, "What's the next accomplishment?"I was asking myself, "When was the last time I did something just because it sounded fun?" Honestly, I couldn't think of many answers.
Somewhere along the way, I got used to waiting. Waiting until I had more money. Waiting until someone wanted to come with me. Waiting until life slowed down. I don't want to spend another year doing that.
So I came up with something I'm calling Year 32 of 32.
Before I turn 33, I want to experience 32 things I've never done before. Nothing over the top. Just little moments that remind me there's still so much life to experience.
This August, I'm starting with two things I've always wanted to do.
I'm going to see a concert by myself. I'm also taking my first pottery class by myself. Neither one is a huge accomplishment.
But I think that's the point. Not everything has to change your life to be meaningful. Sometimes you just need to remind yourself that you're still growing, still curious, and still willing to try something new. I don't know what the other 30 experiences will teach me.
Maybe they'll inspire new songs. Maybe they'll become stories I tell years from now. Maybe they'll simply remind me to enjoy the life I'm building instead of always thinking about the next destination.
Either way, I want to remember this year.
So this is the beginning.
Thanks for coming along with me.
Let's see where 32 takes us.
xoxo,
Indigo
